A World Without Logos
by Baron Hausenpheffer
Summary: After the assassination attempt on Integra, Alucard's guilt and rage at being unable to protect his master threaten to consume him. Then, a mysterious stranger intervened... Please read and review!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Hellsing.

**"No Offense" Warning**: This particular fic involves quite a bit of religious subject matter. To be exact, it is "old school" Christian dogma as interpreted by the author. If that offends, confuses, or otherwise scares you off, then I'd advise you to stop reading right here.

Author's Note: Few people, almost no people, get through this life without some sort of tragedy befalling themselves or someone they care for. When this happens, the temptation is to abandon hope and demand an answer "from on high". The question of why a just God would allow so much (seemingly unjust) suffering is a question that has plagued mankind since time began. Better minds than mine have wrestled with it, and were far more articulate in doing so. Nonetheless, I've decided to give this eternal riddle my best shot, giving _my_ answer in the form of what happened "behind the scenes" directly before and after the attempt on Sir Integra Hellsing's life...

This story takes place in the anime, beginning before Order 9 ("Red Rose Vertigo") and ending in the same place as Order 10 ("Master of Monster").

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Hellsing's opening theme, "The World Without Logos", is probably the best-known music from that series, with the possible exception of "Shine". However, few people are aware of the title's actual meaning.

The word "logos" is Greek, and roughly translates to "word". In the ancient Greek context, it stood for reason and the natural order of the universe. However, in Christian theology it is one of the names for Jesus Christ.

_"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it." _

**Gospel of John, 1:1-5**

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_**BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!**_

"Whoah... Nice shot, Master!" Seras gulped.

The head and chest of the target facing the vampire Alucard were now sporting gaping holes.

"Yes, not bad, if I do say so myself," he replied with a smirk. "Walter truly outdid himself when he designed the Jackal. It took some getting used to at first, but now it feels almost like an extension of myself. Do you feel the same way about that howitzer he has you hauling around, police girl?"

Seras Victoria didn't hear him. She was lost in her own little world; the recent death of her friend Harry Anders had shocked her, and matters she hadn't given much thought to before now were weighing heavily on her mind.

"Police girl? Helloooo...?" Alucard thumped her with his pointer finger in annoyance.

"Wh-what?" she jumped, startled out of her daze.

"What's with you, police girl?" he asked, frustrated. "You've been moping around like a depressed little adolescent for the past two days! I was hoping that blasting holes into targets might snap you out of it, but apparently destruction doesn't give you quite the thrill it does me. So are you going to tell me what's the matter with you, or am I going to have to read your mind?"

She knew it was no empty threat, so she resigned to tell him, even she doubted that he would understand.

"A friend of mine was killed in a car bomb attack recently, right after he dropped me off," Seras solemly informed him. "I know I should be getting used to people I care about dying by now, but--it just wasn't right. He didn't even have a chance to fight death; it just took him. He was young, had family and friends..." She was getting upset, but was careful to keep her voice steady and her eyes dry; her master did NOT appreciate signs of weakness.

"I don't know..." she continued. "It just got me to thinking about things. You know: Is there a God? Why does he let things like that happen? (_Ha!_) Can vampires go to heaven? Before I joined Hellsing, I was a pretty religious person, but now..."

Alucard smiled in amusement. "Mankind has been asking those questions since the beginning of time, police girl. I'm obviously no expert, but 500 years has given me a little insight on such things."

Pulling out his older gun, the .454 Cassul, Alucard began firing at the targets again, but kept up the conversation. "There is a God; if there weren't, I and those like me would have brought this world to ruin already. The fact that crucifixes cause me quite a bit of discomfort is further proof of the fact that he exists. As for your second question, he allows people to kill and be killed because, quite frankly, he doesn't care."

"You don't really believe that!" Seras exclaimed, shocked at this callous viewpoint.

Alucard turned toward Seras, fixing such an intense gaze on his servant that her blood almost froze in her veins. "I **know** it!" he stated coldy. "I was human long, long ago, Seras, but I still remember certain things. I remember seeing my friends and family slaughtered. I remember selling my soul to God's opposite number in return for the power to carry out my revenge. I remember all that I have done, and all of the people that I have killed, since that time. I have seen things that would make an athiest out of a saint, and have done things quite a bit worse than that. If there is indeed a God, Seras Victoria, then he is a distant one, with very little concern for his creation."

"...Master? You mentioned crucifixes, so what about his Son...?" she ventured, hoping that her master's disturbing world-view wasn't all-encompassing.

Alucard ceased firing for a second. Without a word, he pulled Jackal out of its holster and tossed it to her. She looked down at the inscription on it, the white letters a sharp contrast to the jet-black gun.

Alucard raised his gun and aimed it at the target. "Jesus Christ is in heaven, now, Seras Victoria."

_**BLAM!**_

The target took a shot to the eye. "For what it's worth," he concluded, "I wouldn't count on joining him there. We are monsters, police girl, demons who walk the earth. I doubt very seriously that we are welcome inside heaven's gates."

"How can you say such things?!" she shouted, shocked and hurt at her master's cold, insensitive comment.

Alucard paid no attention to her, instead concentrating on the much-abused target in front of him.

Seras clenched her fists in anger as a lone tear rolled down her cheek. Her master was wrong! She was a good person; she believed in God! Surely... he couldn't be right?

That thought disturbed her more than words can express. She walked out of the room, knowing that the sooner Alucard was out of her sight, the sooner she could put this conversation out of thought and out of mind...

-------------------------

The next day was a busy one. Hellsing had been sent to infiltrate a supposedly ghoul-infested castle, only to be ordered out by MI-5. Seras had sensed something very unusual (_bad_ unusual) inside the castle, but Hellsing had been ordered to back off; there was nothing she could do. The rest of the day hadn't been much easier, and by nightfall, Seras was "about to give out".

"Soooo tired..." moaned Seras as she plopped onto her bed. "If I weren't an animated corpse already, I think I'd die from exhaustion..."

She pressed the button to shut the lid on her coffin-bed. It came down, but was up again in under two seconds.

"I can't go to bed before taking a bath..."

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"Sir Integra's sister?!" she gasped, surprised. "But they don't even look alike!"

Walter didn't look amused.

"Err... I guess with such a complicated family history, these kinds of things _would_ happen! Hahaha! Heh heh...ahem!" Seras giggled, embarassed.

She was glad Walter was here. It was probably her imagination, but before his appearance, Seras had heard strange noises and had a bizzare "vision" like the one in the castle earlier today... Walter's prescence seemed to bring everything back to normal. Still, as she watched "Laura Hellsing" walk up the stairs, Seras couldn't help but feel uneasy for some reason...

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"So, you have the gall to come here, do you?" Alucard asked. The darkness of Hellsing's basement floor had no answer. "I certainly hope you have the power to back up your enormous pretensions!"

Still, no sound came from the direction Alucard was facing.

"You know, the two of us are not that different. We have both put aside our pride in order to serve our human masters. How utterly...pitiful."

All of the sudden, purple lines seemed to materialize in the distance. As the sound of footsteps reached his ears, Alucard grinned sadistacally.

"_Finally; it was getting a little dull around here lately!_" he thought as Incognito drew ever closer...

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Seras was walking back toward her room, when (out of nowhere) she suddenly had a splitting headache. However, the suddenness of this migraine was nowhere near as troubling as the images that accompanied it.

In a flash of red and white blurs, Seras saw Sir Integra Hellsing, upstairs in her office. She seemed dazed, struggling to move but unable to. Her sister, Laura, was next to her, unbuttoning her uniform. However, it was suddenly abundantly clear that "Laura" was anything but human!

The headache (and the vision) came to a sudden stop. Seras's eyes went wide; **that** was no hallucination. Immediately, she turned and ran back up the basement stairs, trying to get to Integra's office as fast as she possibly could, but whenever she reached the first-floor stairs, her way was blocked by a very familiar figure.

"Walter!" she cried, relieved. "Sir Integra is--"

"Don't you **DARE** disturb Sir Integra!" he interrupted in a low, menacing tone. He flicked his wrist, and Seras felt something sharp sting her cheek. As the blood ran down the side of her face, Seras saw that the butler had attacked her with his "strings".

"Walter!" Seras muttered, bewildered. "What's wrong with you?! Please, let me pass!"

The old butler didn't seem to hear her; his eyes had an odd, glass-like look to them, and it seemed like he was staring at something far away.

"_He's being controlled!_" Seras suddenly realized, her heart sinking to her feet. "_But how can I possibly hurt Walter?! He's been so kind to me!_"

As he twirled the string in the air, she suddenly thought of something else.

"_Maybe I should be worrying about **him** hurting **me**..._"

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"You and I... we're different," Incognito stated matter-of-factly.

Alucard raised an eyebrow. "What is that supposed to mean?"

The African vampire grinned knowingly. "Only one of us has a master anymore."

Alucard's eyes went wide in shock. "_He's been clouding my mind! All of this was just a distraction to--to--!_"

"**What in God's name have you done?!**" Alucard roared. The darkness surrounding the enfuriated vampire blackened even further, and hundreds of eyes opened all around him. "I'm going to fill you full of my Jackal's bullets!!!" he screamed in rage.

----------------------

Above Hellsing HQ, an enormous, swirling, red pentagram appeared in the sky. It bathed the entire mansion in a blood-red light, dispelling the evil magic at work inside.

Walter "snapped to", finding himself holding strings that felt like they were stretched taut. Looking down, he saw to his horror that the other ends of the threads were wrapped tightly around his young friend's neck!

The old man released his stranglehold on the young vampire, leaving her gasping for breath.

"Wh-what was I just doing?! God!" he gasped, horrified.

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"Hurry, Alucard," Incognito smiled wickedly. "It simply wouldn't do for your master to die alone. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Incognito faded away into the darkness, leaving only his purple tatoos, which soon followed him.

Alucard followed his lead, disappearing into a portal and reappearing outside Integra's office. As he emerged from the wall, he saw Walter and Seras running at break-neck speed toward the office door.

"_Please... don't let me be too late, Integra!_" he thought, panicked.

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The dead vampiress Camilla lay on the floor, little more than dust mingled with blood. Staggering as she rose, Integra stood up and walked to the other side of her desk.

"_Integra, my master...!_" Alucard thought, relieved. "_I should have known it would take more than that blood-sucking whore to bring you to your knees!_" Just then, he noticed something that made his hope fall, then completely disappear. "_Those bite marks... she has been tainted._" Alucard was glad he was wearing his shades; his eyes were anything but dry as he reached for the Jackal. "_I'm sorry, my master. I have failed to save your life, but I will save you from an afterlife as a ghoul. You... would have wanted it this way..._"

Integra grabbed something off of her desk, making Alucard freeze in place. He saw to his surprise that she had grabbed a blood-stained knife.

"Sir Integra!" Seras shouted, rushing toward her in concern.

"Stay back!!!" Integra ordered.

Alucard grinned weakly. "_So she has chosen to fight... my master is every inch a Hellsing._"

With a quick slicing motion, Integra cut her own throat with the small blade. As she fell to the floor, Walter and Seras gaped in horror. "SIR INTEGRA!!!" Seras screamed.

As Walter ran over to his master's side, he heard her say in a faint voice, "Impure blood flows through my veins..."

Walter tore off his coat and tied it tightly around the gaping wound in Integra's neck as Seras stood by helplessly. Alucard watched the panicked butler and weeping vampiress do what they could for their master, leader, and friend. The usually-smug vampire stood back, a pained expression on his face and one thought running continually through his mind:

"_Please, Integra... don't die..._"

END OF CHAPTER 1

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Hey, there! I know that the second half of this was a review for those of you familiar with the anime, but I decided to include it anyway (mostly to catch up those familiar with the comic but not the show). Also, I thought it would be neat to show what was going through the minds of these characters (especially Alucard) during this time.

While Seras's and Alucard's little "religious discussion" might seem unrelated to the assassination attempt on Integra, there **_is_** a connection, and the next chapter will make it crystal-clear. Please review, and keep an eye out for the next installment!


	2. Chapter 2

"It's as silent as the grave in here," muttered Alucard under his breath.

Despite the morbid implied humor, the vampire was right. The doctors had judged it too dangerous to move Integra, so they had set up an impromptu ER inside her office. They were waiting for the bleeding to finally stop; if that didn't happen, there would be no point in an operation. Walter spoke quietly with one of the nurses, and finally turned and walked toward the two vampires leaning on the back wall.

"Walter, what did she say? Will Sir Integra make it?" Seras asked, half-dreading the answer.

"They're... not sure," the old butler frowned. "The bleeding has finally stopped, and the doctors will operate soon. They're amazed that she lived this long; most people die from a jugular cut within 45 seconds. To be honest, her chances aren't very good, but if **anyone** can survive this, it's Integra. That girl has a will of iron... she always has..."

Walter took off his monocle and wiped it on his shirt; apparently it had gotten wet somehow. Unwilling to discuss the matter further, he walked past the two vampires and out the door, muttering something under his breath about "making tea."

The blonde, female bloodsucker hung her head. Seras truly felt sick, both from worry and from guilt.

"_I'm sorry, Sir Integra,_" she thought miserably. "_I could tell something was wrong, but I didn't figure out what it was until it was too late. If only I'd..._"

"Police girl. You must pay close attention. Watch how Integra fares in battle."

Her master's voice snapped Seras out of her "what if's". She looked up at Alucard, confused. "Battle?"

He stared at Integra as the doctors gathered around her. "Integra tore through her own throat; she shed her own blood and chose to fight for her life. Giving in is what kills people. When you refuse to surrender with all your heart, only then do you transcend your humanity. 'Even in the face of death, never give up!' That is the strength of our master."

After that, no words passed between them. Seras reflected on what Alucard had just told her; it reminded her a great deal of her experience in Cheddar.

"_Is that why he chose to bring me back to life?_" she wondered. "_Because I wouldn't give up?_"

While these and countless other thoughts floated through Seras's head, only one thought echoed through Alucard's.

"_I'm sorry, Integra. I have failed you..._"

The vampire stared at the helpless, dying form of his master in morbid fascination.

"_Integra, my master; it's hard to see you like this. You were always so strong, so fearless... My very presence has made grown men quake and wet themselves, but you always griped me out like I was a mere child. I have served 13 different masters of the Hellsing family, and each impressed me in his or her own way. In the heat of battle, there was never a more courageous man than Simon Hellsing. Solomon himself couldn't have been wiser than Harold. And Laura... she died as she had lived: with dignity and honor. But Integra... you are in a whole different class. _

_Your body is weak, femine, not overly athletic, and no more durable than the average human shell. That isn't where your strength lies, though. It's that soul of yours; it burns brighter than 1,000 suns. When you were only 14, you spit in my face and told me you would rather die than beg for your life. If anything, you've only become stronger since then! You've done your duty always; perhaps, this time, at the cost of your own life._"

Out of the corner of his eye, Alucard saw Seras start to say something, then stop herself. He could sense that she wanted to ask him something about Integra, but beyond that, her emotional state made it impossible to determine exactly what her question was. Finally, frustrated and upset, Seras gave up and stalked out of the room. Alucard was actually relieved she had left; he really wasn't in the mood for talking right now. As he watched the doctors and nurses mill around Integra, his reflective thoughts slowly gave way to angry guilt.

"_Damn it! Why couldn't I save you?! Protecting the master of the Hellsing family is my most basic duty! I let my desire for battle distract me, and it looks like it may have cost me the life of one of the only people I can truly call 'friend'... With all of my vampiric strength, all of my heightened senses, all of my demonic powers, I still failed..._"

"Helplessness when a loved one is in trouble. It's one of the worst feelings in the world, isn't it, Mr. Alucard?"

Alucard jumped involuntarily; who spoke, and how did they sneak up on him like that? He whirled around to see a short man standing a few feet to his left. The man had salt-and-pepper hair, a beard, looked to be in his mid-40's, and was wearing an ordinary black tuxedo. He was also wearing an old-fashioned sheath and sword at his side. Alucard quickly pulled out Jackal and pointed it at the man's head.

"You, sir, are not Hellsing personnel," Alucard growled angrily. "Do you work for the same group that controls Incognito, or did the Iscariot Organization send you? Regardless, you'd better give me a name and a damn good story by the count of three, or I'll be forced to give your head some extra ventillation! Three!"

The man looked taken aback, and smiled apologetically. "Please, sir. There's no need for that! Put the gun away."

"Two!" Alucard said gravely.

"S-sir! Really!" the man protested.

"One!" hissed the vampire as his trigger finger tightened.

"All right! All right!" the man held his hands up defensively. "If you really must know, my name is Richard! I'm an angel on a mission from God!"

"HA! Wrong answer," Alucard smiled wickedly.

_**BLAM!**_

Alucard grinned, waiting for the smoke to clear so he could see his handiwork. What he did see almost made him drop his gun in shock! The bullet was hovering in place a few millimeters away from Richard's face!!! Alucard blinked, and the bullet fell to the ground.

"_Tsk, tsk, tsk,_" Richard clicked in disapproval. "Such manners. _You're_ old enough to know better!"

With that, he pointed his finger toward Alucard's gun. "_What's he up to?_" Alucard wondered, confused. He didn't have to wait long to find out.

"What the--?!"

Alucard's gun suddenly felt like it weighed a ton! Now unable to hold it up with one hand, he grabbed it with both and lifted upward with all of his might. Still, he was unable to keep it level enough to fire on the mysterious intruder! Alucard froze when he felt a cold, steel blade touch his neck; the man was holding his sword to the vampire's throat. Knowing it would only take one simple motion to decapitate him, Alucard reluctantly dropped his gun.

"You made a wise choice," smiled the "angel". "I can assure you that my sword would've been much more effective on you than your bullets were on me."

A thought suddenly popped into Alucard's head: why didn't the gunshot alert Hellsing security? He turned toward Integra's operating table, expecting the orderlies to be hiding behind the monitoring devices, but instead was shocked to see that they seemed not to have heard the struggle at all! Alucard's mouth hung open in disbelief, but it quickly closed into an amused grin.

"_Could this fellow really be what he says he his?_" he thought excitedly. "_Interesting... I'll play along for now; this COULD be fun!_"

"Really! An actual angel!" Alucard laughed. "Who would have thought it?! Well, Mr. Angel, if that's what you truly are, I can assure you that you're in the wrong place..."

Alucard suddenly narrowed his eyes and spoke darkly. "Unless, of course, that hypocrite you call 'master' has sent you to take mine away from me. Is that the case?"

Richard looked very irritated. "Mind your tongue, vampire! I am not the angel of death, if that's what you're asking. I do not know exactly what the fate of your master will be. Actually, I've come here to see YOU."

At that, Alucard began to laugh hysterically. "**HAHAHAHAHA! **Dotell! My, you ARE off track. Obviously you don't know who I am, or you wouldn't be here!"

Cutting the vampire off, Richard looked very sternly at him and said, "Actually, Vlad, I know EXACTLY who you are."

Alucard stopped laughing immediately and turned deathly pale.

"Something the matter?" the angel queried.

"I... haven't been called by that name in a very, very long time..." Alucard answered slowly.

Richard raised one eyebrow slightly. "You say I don't know who you are. Well, where I come from, we like to keep accurate records, so please help us correct our files! Let's see..."

He reached into his tuxedo and pulled out a large manilla file-folder. Opening it, he began reading its contents aloud.

"Name: Vlad Tepes

Aliases: Vlad the Impaler, Dracula, Alucard

Titles: Count of Wallachia, Permanent Retainer of the Hellsing Family

Born: January 29, 1431

Died: October 31, 1476

You were the noble son of Vlad Dracul, or 'Vlad the Devil'. You had a loving mother, and you cared deeply about your brothers. Your country was under constant threat from the Turkish armies, so your father trained you and your brothers in the art of war from an early age. You were engaged to a woman you were madly in love with: Sophia, Princess of Transylvania, I believe. Although you had a violent temper, you were also a compassionate man, very capable of showing mercy. You showed such promise to be a good prince, until that day..."

Alucard darkened visibly, and gritted his teeth in anger. He'd tried so hard to forget all of this! Although it had happened over 500 years ago, the memories were still far too fresh, too painful...

"On your fifteenth birthday, you were sent out on an reconaissance raid against the Turks, only to discover that you had played right into their hands. The Turks had abandoned their camp and attacked your father's castle 'en masse' while your third of the Wallachian army was away, overwhelming and massacring everyone inside. They killed every man, woman, and child within those walls. That included your parents, siblings, and fiancee, correct?"

If Alucard hadn't been fairly certain that it would be pointless to try, he would've killed Richard right then and there.

"Your heart turned black that day. You were willing to do anything at any cost to avenge them, no matter what the consequences. You sold your soul to Satan in return for the power to 'repay the Turks a thousand-fold, to make them curse the day they were born.' Those _were_ the exact words, right? The next Turkish regiment to invade Wallachia didn't return, and when their comrades came after them, they were greeted at the border by a forest of spikes with human bodies impaled over them. That frightened group of soldiers retreated as fast as their legs could carry them, and the legend of 'Dracula' was born. Invincible and unstoppable, you slaughtered all of the Turks you could find, and when they stopped coming as frequently, you turned your bloodlust on your own people.

This state of affairs continued for ten years, until Lucifer came on your twenty-fifth birthday to claim you. To his surprise, you fought him fiercely! Although it would've been a small matter for someone with his power to drag your soul 'kicking and screaming' down to Hell, he decided to punish you (and all of humanity with you) by changing you into a vampire. After that, you continued playing with the Turks until you bored of them, allowing them to behead and 'kill' you, if only to be rid of them. Thus the 'death date', right? You terrorized Europe from that time until 1843, when the Hellsing family finally brought you low after an attempt on Queen Victoria's life. They kept you alive and forced you into perpetual servitude to the House of Hellsing. Under the name 'Alucard', you have served them faithfully ever since; tell me, in what do I err?"

All of the mirth had long since evaporated from Alucard's face. "In nothing. Your records are very exact."

"One question, though..." Richard asked curiously, "why 'Alucard'? I can see that it's your old name in reverse, but--"

"My _purpose_ went in reverse," Alucard smiled weakly. "I went from feeding off humans to protecting them, so I thought the name change would be appropriate."

"I see. Thank you!" he said happily as he jotted the new info down in the folder. "I must admit, that little puzzle had even **us** stumped!"

Alucard stared in solemn disbelief at the man in front of him. "You really are what you claim to be, aren't you? An angel... You must be; the only men who could have supplied you with some of that information have long ago crumbled to dust. Most of them I killed myself. Still, the question begs to be asked: What do you want with me, servant of God?"

Richard smiled oddly. "Why do angels always visit this earthly plane, Alucard? I have a message for you."

END OF CHAPTER 2

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Anti-disclaimer: I do own Richard. If, by any chance, someone wants to use him, they've got to ask me first.

There; that's out of the way. I waited until the end of the chapter for the anti-disclaimer (does that make it a "claimer"?) so as to not give anything away. I hope you enjoyed this installment; it obviously contains more original stuff than the last one. "Alucard's folder" actually took some research, by the way. The birth date, death date, and method of execution are 100 percent fact, or so the Encyclopedia Brittanica tells me.

Stick around! Besides containing the "meat and potatoes" of the Baron Hausenpheffer School of Philosophy, the next chapter also contains this story's conclusion. In the meantime, please review!


	3. Chapter 3

"Why do angels always visit this earthly plane, Alucard? I have a message for you."

Alucard nodded. "Go ahead; I'm listening."

"The Lord has sent me here to tell you that he is very pleased with your actions of late. He remembers the 'old you', the Dracula who murdered countless numbers of innocent men, women, and children for no reason other than the thrill it gave you. Your behavior as Alucard, especially over the past five years, is a welcome improvement. (_grins_) He says he hasn't seen such a positive change since he said 'Hello' to Saul a few miles outside of Damascus."

Alucard smiled slightly at the last statement, but inwardly he wondered if it might be a joke. "You can inform your master that his pleasure is very misplaced. If it were up to me, I would still be stalking the night, drinking my fill and killing as I see fit. Do you see this crest on my glove?"

He held it up for Richard to see. "He can thank this mixture of pagan symbols and Christian holy words. They are what bind me to the House of Hellsing. _That_ family is solely responsible for my actions. If your master particulary enjoyed my boy-scout routine over the past half-decade, tell him to thank that dying woman on the operating table over there; she should be coming to join him shortly."

"You can blame your good behavior on whomever you wish, son," Richard replied, "but we both know that you have changed. Integra Wingates Hellsing did not order you give Seras Victoria a new lease on life. Nor can anyone be ordered to strike up a friendship, as you have done with Walter Dollneaz. You can say whatever you want, but you wouldn't leave the Hellsing Organization even if you could. You love her far too much."

Alucard looked startled, then amused. "Heh. I'm afraid you're mistaken. I do respect Integra; perhaps you mistook it for love because there are so few people I give that honor to."

Richard gave a knowing smile. "I won't argue the point, Alucard; as I said, that's not why I'm here. Even if you _don't_ (_cough_), there are many people who do love Miss Hellsing, and with good reason. Her troops love her because she is strong, for that 'iron will' Walter spoke of."

The angel gave a sad chuckle. "Right now, he's explaining to Seras why he's making tea for a woman on the brink of death. _He_ loves her because, in a very real sense, she's his adopted daughter. Walter never had any children of his own, and with Integra's father's death, he became the man she turned to in times of trouble; it's only natural that he's developed 'a father's love' for her. Your charge, Seras, will also miss Integra terribly if she passes. That girl senses that what little stability her life has left depends on Miss Hellsing, and loves her all the more for it. And my master... my master loves her too. She has rescued so many of his children so many times; he never forgets such things."

"Then tell me why he let this happen to her!" Alucard exploded, surprising even himself with the violence of his outburst. "If he really cared about Integra, then why did he allow a filthy demoness to make her into its last meal?!!! Either your master, God, is impotent, or he is something far, far worse!"

Richard whirled to face the enraged vampire; for the first time, the angel seemed truly angry!

"Shut your blasphemous mouth before I nail it shut with my sword!" he roared. The unexpected reaction caught Alucard off-guard, providing the silence the angel had requested. After taking a second to calm himself, Richard spoke to Alucard in a quiet-but-firm tone.

"'All things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to his purpose.' That was in a letter St. Paul wrote to the believers in Rome, Mr. Alucard, but it holds very true for Integra as well. Very, very little happens by chance in this world; my master has a purpose for the misfortune that has befallen yours. Perhaps he is injuring her now to save her from death later on, or perhaps he will take her to Heaven in order to save her soul from some future act that would damn her. I don't know what Miss Hellsing's fate will be, but just learn the lesson Job did, and trust me on this one. Whatever happens, it was done with Integra's best interests in mind."

Alucard was unsure about how to reply to that. On the one hand, he still couldn't understand why such a cruel thing had to happen to such a good person. On the other, he wanted very badly to believe what Richard was saying: that, despite appearances, this tragedy was for Integra's own good...

"All right, Richard. I'll take your word for it," Alucard finally answered, a tired smile passing over his face. "Maybe... even after 500 years... there are still some things beyond my understanding."

Richard's reserve melted away as a warm smile spread across _his_ face. "How does the old saying go? 'With age, at last comes wisdom.' There just might be hope for you yet, Alucard."

He walked over to the vampire-in-red and put a hand on his shoulder. "Thank you for understanding, son. I've almost accomplished my mission; there's still one thing that I need to show you. Would you follow me, please?"

------------------------

"Here we are," Richard informed the nosferatu as they came to a stop.

Alucard looked at the sign on the door, and then turned toward the angel in disgust. "The Hellsing chapel? I said that I accepted what you told me, and I trust your master to do what is best for mine; that's far from an invitation to 'evangelize' me! I do hope you'll excuse me if I'm not quite ready to drop down on my knees and beg for forgiveness just yet."

"I didn't expect you to," Richard replied. "Getting you to do that would take more work than parting the Red Sea! Actually, we're here in regards to the last part of my message, concerning the person sitting on the front row, to the far left. Take a look."

Curious, Alucard peered into the room through the slightly-cracked door. The room was pitch-black, but his eyes, used to nocturnal sightseeing, adjusted almost immediately. On left end of the front row, a blonde head poked slightly above the pew; Alucard knew that noggin anywhere!

"The police girl? Really... Heh. Heheh. Hahahaha! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Richard looked at Alucard disapprovingly. "May I ask what has tickled you so?"

"Hahahaha! Just the thought of it!" he chortled. "Imagine: a vampire, an animated, undead corpse containing a damned soul, praying! How in the world is she doing it with a straight face?! Hahahaha!"

Just then, a mischievious gleam appeared in Alucard's eye. "I simply must hear this little conversation!" Focusing on his unsuspecting servant, Alucard began to work his way into her thoughts. His smug grin quickly faded, however.

"Wha--? I can't read her mind! Someone is blocking me..." he muttered. He looked suspiciously toward Richard.

"Don't look at me, Alucard," he replied with a smirk. "A higher power than mine is impeding your path. Her prayers are words not meant for you. What? Surprised that her prayer is getting through? Seras Victoria didn't become a vampire because she wanted to, you know. Something _you_ have always failed to understand is that vampirism is a physical condition, one that has no bearing on one's salvation. Christ didn't spurn lepers while he walked the earth, so why should a vampire be any different?"

Before Alucard could respond, a sudden movement caught his eye. It was Seras; apparently she had finished, because she got up and quietly exited through a side door. Alucard narrowed his eyes at Richard, still annoyed that he had been denied his fun.

The angel took one look at the peeved vampire and burst out laughing. Alucard almost always got what he wanted, and his reaction to this _not_ happening was quite priceless!

"I can't stand to see a grown monster cry," Richard teased. Turning serious, he said, "Alucard, if you really want to know what she prayed about, I'll tell you; perhaps it will do you some good. Seras started out by apologizing for not 'talking' in a very long time... Her requests were very reasonable, asking only for forgiveness and for the life of someone dear to her. She acknowledged that she was a fallen and condemned creature (something she has in common with all mankind), saying that she didn't deserve anything but punishment. Still, she prayed that God would answer her prayer this one time, because Integra means so much to so many people, especially her master..."

"How many times do I have to tell you?!" Alucard snapped. "I don't--"

"--love her. I know, I know!" the angel said, scratching his head. ("_How do we keep getting sidetracked by this, anyway?_")

Despite himself, Alucard had to smile. He'd always said that Seras Victoria was one of the most selfless people he'd ever known; this was only further proof of that.

"_Her willingness to put others above herself could very well be her strongest quality... If it doesn't get her killed, first,_" he thought whimsically.

Richard's voice suddenly rang out, snapping the vampire out of his musings. "Anyway, Alucard, I want you to listen carefully. This last part of the message is a **command**, not a request. Before she became a vampire, Seras Victoria was a very religious girl, a member of the Anglican Church that missed Sunday services only rarely. I suppose it was only natural, since being a police officer put her in the line of fire so often; 'no athiests in foxholes', and all that. Becoming one of the undead has been quite a crisis of faith for her, and this is the first time that she's worked up the courage to pray to her 'other master' since that night. God is overjoyed that she's returned to him at last, and hopes this will be the start of a renewed correspondance, so to speak."

"However..." Richard glared at Alucard, "**someone** has been putting crazy ideas in her head that the Lord doesn't want her anymore. The order is for that someone, namely _you_, to cease all such nonsense immediately."

"Hmm... Tough choice," Alucard smirked. "Technically, I'm only bound to serve one master, and pestering Seras is such fun. Tell me, what do you intend to do if I refuse?"

Richard got what could only be called "an evil twinkle" in his eye. "Let's just say that I told Adolph Hitler to repent, but blew me off and sent his troops to a small city called 'Stalingrad'..."

"Urk! All right, all right!" Alucard replied, raising his arms in playful defense. "If Seras feels like praying, I won't bother her about it. Just tell your master to cancel the smiting!"

"Hahaha! Agreed. I'll phone that right in," Richard chuckled. "Well, my mission is over. One last word: if you choose to disregard everything I've said, that's your business, but I do want you to remember one thing. Not long ago you said that, because of the suffering mankind is subjected to, God must not care about his creations. If my mission accomplished nothing else, I hope that I have shown you that that couldn't be further from the truth."

"This isn't a world without Logos; just because Jesus Christ has departed this world doesn't mean that he has abandoned it. The Hellsing Organization protects Great Britain from the forces of darkness without them being any the wiser; so it is with my master. Goodbye, Mr. Alucard, and peace be with you."

Alucard tipped his hat toward Richard. "Fare thee well, angel. Tell your master that he has my gratitude for watching after Integra. **I** don't forget such things, either."

The angel smiled, nodded, and began walking away, but just as he was about to round the corner, a look of surprise flashed over Richard's face, as if he had forgotten something. Turning to Alucard with a huge smile, he added, "I've just received good news from HQ; say hello to Miss Hellsing for me, will you, Alucard?"

Alucard's jaw dropped; did he mean what he thought he meant?! Before the shocked vampire could respond, Richard had turned the corner and disappeared from view. Alucard considered running after him, when a familiar voice stopped him in his tracks.

"Alucard! Finally, I've found you!"

Alucard turned to see Walter beaming from ear to ear. "I have wonderful news! Dr. Seward says that Integra's going to be alright! She woke up for a few seconds, and seemed to be in full possession of her faculties! Do you hear me, you old bloodsucker, you? **SHE'S ALRIGHT**!!!"

Walter let out a whoop of joy and embraced Alucard in a bear hug that lifted the surprised vampire right off the ground, putting considerable pressure on his ribs!

"_If he's a feeble old man, then I'm the Queen's auntie!_" Alucard thought as he gasped for breath.

When Walter finally let him go, Alucard gave the old butler a toothy grin. "I'm glad, too, Walter. I was beginning to lose hope... before I received some inside information..."

Walter raised one eyebrow quizzically. "Now what in the world is that supposed to mean?"

Alucard took off his shades, folded them, and put them into his pocket. "Remind me to tell you someday, Walter. It's quite a story, really. But right now, our master could use some tea and aggravation to get her strength back. (_grins_) Do you think we're up to the task?"

Walter chuckled as the two walked down the hallway and toward Integra's bedside. "Old friend," he replied, "I'm sure of it."

THE END

Well, there you have it: this author's worldview in a nutshell. The next time disaster strikes your life, or if you're still trying to get over some calamity, remember the moral of this story: everything happens for a reason. "Logos" has your back, folks. I firmly believe this with all of my heart 'n soul.

This story was **definitely** uncharacteristic of both me and my writing style, but I hope you liked it anyway. Whether you did or didn't, please drop me a review; I'd appreciate it!


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